Checking In With God

“I don’t know where I’m going, but I’m on my way.” ~ Carl Sandburg

Photo by Mathias P.R. Reding on Pexels.com

It is customary in most jobs to have a performance review or a progress report done annually. This allows goals to be set, and allows both the employee and the employer or supervisor to monitor progress towards the goals. Pretty simple concept.

Often in my walk of faith, I check in with God for a progress report. Usually done in quiet, this gives me a chance to see if I’m doing well, if there are things I need to change, new ideas that may or not may be in alignment with His plan, etc. It’s not a scheduled event, just something that occurs when I feel a certain heaviness or restlessness.

This time, the tete-a-tete occurred in the quiet stillness of a misty night while sitting alone in the hot tub. As I glanced around at the silhouettes of bare trees against the grey sky, I first marveled at the seasons and how each feeds into the next. (Cue the “Circle of Life” from The Lion King, here if you choose.) This segued into the idea of the seasons of our lives – infancy, childhood, teen years, young adult, mature adult (give or take), older adult, even wiser and older adults. We start out taking in infancy as we rely on others to meet our every need, but (hopefully) as we get on in years, we are giving more than we take, guiding and mentoring those who are younger.

My next thoughts were, ‘Am I doing enough?‘ Being an overachiever with OCD and a propensity for perfectionism, I’m very concerned with no doing ‘enough.’ Who gets to arbitrarily determine what ‘enough’ is, I’m not sure.

To what standards am I holding myself? There are many. Proverbs 31 describes a great role model for women. Titus 2:3-5 gives instruction for older women. From a young age, I’ve been an avid reader of biographies of strong women: Corrie ten Boom, Amelia Earhart, Gladys Aylward, Jessie Benton Fremont, Louisa May Alcott, Wilma Rudolph, Florence Nightingale, Lillian Trasher and Joanna Gaines. Most assuredly I am not perfect, nor do I aim to be. I have made more than my fair share of mistakes and will own my part in them willingly.

As recent upheavals and life events have started to settle down, my next question is, “What’s next?” Life is never dull; it isn’t to be viewed as an observer but a full-fledged participant. While I don’t exactly know what’s next, I know that I am more than likely already on my way to the next set of adventures.

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