“Happily ever after is not a fairy tale. It’s a choice.” ~ Fawn Weaver
One of my guilty pleasures is watching the Lifetime show “Married At First Sight” – actually it isn’t a guilty pleasure. It’s just a pleasure. I enjoy watching it. I enjoy watching how couples who have never met navigate the tricky road of matrimony. Ass backwards.
In our society, arranged marriages are uncommon. Back in the day, it was THE way to get married. The parents arranged the marriage and it was expected to last – the bride and groom were expected to make it work. Today, the dating scene makes it seem like we are trying it on for size until the first bump-in-the-road and then we part ways. The ease of divorce (Do-it-Yourself for only $99) makes it much easier to call things quits than work through problems.
Currently, we meet, greet and date — getting to spend days, weeks, hours, months, years getting to know each other inside and out before we decide whether this is the person we want to be with for the rest of our lives. These couples do it from the altar backwards.
First – marriage, sight unseen until the wedding ceremony. Compatibility is determined by an array of experts – religious, psychological, and sexual.
Second – the honeymoon. This is a week, for the couples to relax and get to know each other via time together and planned activities.
Third – two months in a paid apartment to allow the couples time to discuss finances, beliefs, expectations, pasts and future hopes.
Marriage is hard enough when you think you know the person you’re getting. I can’t even imagine the anxiety and nerves that would rear their heads with an unknown! I love the psychology of seeing two people come together and learn each other’s foibles, weaknesses, eccentricities, etc.